Monday, June 3, 2013

The mystery of the urine scent

Do you ever have those times where you know you can smell something but no one else does? I do, all the time. I have a really weird heightened sense of smell. Of course, this only came about after I became a mom. I can smell puke rooms away and if a diaper needs to be changed from across the house. I am sure many of you developed this unfortunate superpower also. Sometimes this ultra shnoz comes in useful, but most of the time I wish I didn't have it (like every time I pass my son's bathroom). 

A few days ago I am sitting in my living room with a friend and we are playing Black Ops 2, just relaxing the day away by shooting digital men in the groin. All of a sudden, I get a faint whiff of  parfum de pee-pee. I immediately chalk it up to the boys not flushing their toilet again and tell them they need to do that pronto. On we go about our business and everything is fine for about thirty minutes when I catch the scent again. I go and check the boys bathroom, because you know, they do everything I ask the first time *insert eye roll here*. Surprisingly, the toilet is clear and there is nothing in there that smells. Ok strange, but I just decided it must have been left over toilet smelly. 

Ten minutes later, I smell it again. This time I go on a manhunt. I check the laundry. Smelly but nothing that smells like urine. I check my son's bed (we are fighting a bed wetting problem, it has gotten much better) to see if it was wet. I checked to see if the kids had dropped dirty clothes on the way to the laundry room. I checked everything.........or so I thought. 

Two days later and I am still smelling it. I have asked everyone else and no one seems to smell it. I belatedly realize late that day, that the only time I smell it is when I am in my computer desk chair. I am searching around my desk when it suddenly becomes overpowering. The one and only thing near me is my tiny little waste basket. Now just a little back tracking here. I used to have a waste basket in my son's bathroom but do to two little boys playing "let's see who can fill it with pee faster" I have taken it away from them. So with this in mind, I think "Oh no, no trash can is safe. I am going to maim them." I call (read: yell) them down from their rooms and start demanding to know who peed in my trash can in the living room where we entertain our family and friends. Both boys are adamantly denying their involvement, saying they learned their lesson from the bathroom stunt when I see this tiny hand being held up behind them. 

Yes, it was my dainty, girly little daughter. 

My mouth just dropped open and everyone fell silent. Mr. Fluffy trying to hide his giggling brought me out of my shock and I proceeded to ask the question all mothers fear...........why. She tells me that about a week ago (yes.....a week.......pee was in my living room for a week) she was downstairs watching her cartoons and felt the need to pee come on her. For some reason none of us will ever know, she spied my trash can and thought to herself  "I can just squat over that and then I won't have to walk upstairs to the bathroom, no one will ever know." She was surprised to learn that two inches of pee in there would start to stink after a little while. Her punishment was having to clean it out. She has sworn never to do it again. 

Let's hope she sticks to that

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